Virgina & the Storm

This weekend a HUGE storm is supposed to hit our area.  Originally, James, my primary partner, & I were heading to a wedding.  However, I have convinced him to go alone, so I can stay home with my 16-year-old daughter, Virginia, & our dog.

I did not get the reaction out of Virginia I had hoped, although it was sadly the reaction as I expected.  The conversation, by text, went like this:

Me:  I am staying home this weekend.  The storm look like a big one & I did not want you to be alone.

Virginia:  I would have been fine, but okay.

Me:  I am not sure about that.  It's predicted to be very bad.  You are loved and you should not be alone.

Virginia:  Mom, I know you think I don't feel safe by myself, but I do.  That's why I prefer to be alone.  Thanks for your concern.

Me:  Wow, Virginia.  Just wow.  I try to do something out of pure love and I get no gratitude.  I am missing a very important event this weekend, because I am more concerned for your well being.  Thank you for making feel like shit.  I love you too.

Virginia:  You wonder why I don't tell you my feelings towards you & didn't I just say "thank you for your concern"?  Before you bitch at me, please reread everything.

Me:  You said "thank you for your concern", not "thank you for going out of your way to make sure I am safe and comfortable" or "thank you for giving up something important for me."  There was no simple thank you.  There was no gratitude.  There was no respect.  There was no love.

Virginia:  It's still gratitude, Mom.  Maybe not the lovey dovey  way you want, but I am not a lovey child that you want.  I'm heartless. You want a loving child?  Have another one.

Me:  A simple "thank you" works in most situations.  No need to add anything else.  The person hearing it makes the best out of what they hear, particularly by email or text, when no emotions are revealed.

Virginia:  Do you have a problem with what I do?  If you do, I'm going to tell you right now that I do not care.  I also don't care for your expectations, because I shall not, nor want to live up to them.  I will be be the bigger person & say thank you.

Me:  You are slowly pushing away the person who loves & respects you the most.  Just keep that in mind, as you proceed in your life.  Eventually, there will be no one.

Virginia:  Don't lie.  You have no respect for me.  Don't worry.  There will always be someone.

Me:  I hope you find someone who does not love and respect you half as much as I do not.