My relationship with my new girl friend, Rachel, seems to be ending. I realized within three weeks of meeting her that I was not able to give her what she wanted emotionally.
She texted me on a Thursday afternoon, after not seeing me for several days, because of our schedule & said she was disappointed in me for hanging up on her the previous Monday. I asked her to give me details, because I didn't remember. It did not help. I apologized for hurting her feelings, saying I would be more cautious in the future. That was not enough.
In the end, she wanted to hear that I she had value in my life & wanted to know how much that value was. I was speechless. After three weeks, she had little to no value in my life. Uninterested in hurting her feelings, I said, with guidance from my boyfriend, James, that "I show people that I value them, by giving them my time & energy." Rachel was silent for several days. Finally, she came around & said she had digested that I could not give her what she needed, which was indeed correct.
Since then, I've texted her a few times a week, but I've not seen her in three weeks. Much of that was because she went on a trip to the other side of the country. But even then, I have not missed her.
When I met Rachel
& she shared with me her past, filled with neglect & abuse of all kinds. I thought she was an incredibly strong women for not dwelling in the past. However, I realize based upon the parting of our spirits that she is still a little girl who needs to feel needed & valued. She cannot do that for herself & I cannot do it for her.
