Matthew says no to New Year's Eve

I had my conversation with Matthew about not visiting with him for New Year's, but inviting him to my area instead.  As you recall, the reason was to save money & to give me an excuse not be his complete focus, considering I feel guilty for not wanting to try to have another romantic relationship with him.  I also feel like I would have a better time with a group of people, rather than with him alone.

As predicted, he declined the invitation, because I would be focused on other people.  However, he said he would create another way for us to have fun together in January or February.  He also added that he realizes I am not interested in him romantically & I should stop feeling guilty, because he is a grown man & can make his own decisions.

He is absolutely right.  I will no longer dwell on it.

No personal information, please

I have asked Thomas, my secondary boyfriend, for advice on my New Year's Eve plans, because he is part owner of the restaurant I would like to use.  The downside is he has not shared his ownership in the restaurant with me, so I have to be a bit manipulative.

Thomas is kind of funny that way.  He shares very few personal things with anyone, even me, & he does not like to hear about my personal world, although he contributes to it.  I would go absolutely crazy with such a philosophy, if it was not for having James, my primary partner, who is not emotionally immature.

At one point, we discussed having unprotected sex, which would require me to get on birth control.  At first, he said yes.  However, later he declined, saying that after he researched birth control, he found out that often times weight gain is a side effect.  Knowing I am in the process of loosing weight, he did not believe that was a good idea.  

He does not want to discuss our personal lives, but he researched birth control for me?!  That's one of the most personal things a guy can do.

Disneyland Cancelled

Because Matthew has asked for money for his retail store, I have asked him to cancel our planned New Years vacation to Disneyland.  He agreed to do so, but for other reasons.  He said the chick who was organizing the trip for 10 people for the week actually did not negotiate a good package.  The rate would have been $2500, not counting the Disney tickets or anything else.  That is not even worth considering for two people.

In the meantime, I have decided to stay home & plan something for New Year's Eve.  I am thinking dinner & then a burlesque show, with a dozen close friends.  Maybe a party bus to take us to the event.  I also decided to stay at home, rather than see Matthew for New Year's Eve, because I am tired of having to do the whole "I-wanna-be-your-boyfriend-again" dance.  I will, of course, invite Matthew to the festivities, but he will likely say no, considering he will not be my only focus.