I found out recently that Virginia, my 16-year-old daughter, has visited & received love letters from an inmate. When I did a search for him online, I found out that he killed a teenager & attempted to kill another in a gang murder. I know that he she went to see him in prison, because inside the card was a picture of her & his family, surrounding him.
I am heartbroken on so many different levels. First, we do not have a history of gang activity in my family at all & therefore, her being comfortable in such an environment is unacceptable. Next, the letters he sent her were totally inappropriate for a 16-year-old to receive, including the picture of a dog with an erection on the front of the card. Then, the only persona who could have gotten into the prison is the mother of the inmate, by wrongfully claiming she belonged to her, thereby making my daughter related. Finally, after chatting with my family therapist we decided that I cannot have a conversation with anyone involved, including my daughter, the inmate or the inmate's mother, because the inmate has my home address & could do us harm if we take away his "toy".
I did contact the prison & spoke to the head of security & even he was stunned, saying they they rarely receive information like mine. He said he would prevent the inmate from sending or receiving any mail from my daughter & stop her from visiting him in the prison. He also agreed he would do so, without involving my name, by saying that "after a mail inspection" they came across the letter, which I returned to the prison.
After issues like this, although I love my daughter, I cannot wait to disassociate myself from her, as we had planned to do, when she turns 18-years-old. Sadly, now it's a matter of life or death.
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